All posts by wheatypetesworld

Slovakia

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Photos by Natasha

There are many reasons to love Slovakia, at least for me. I lived there for six years.  It was part of the European Community, but still held on to its own individual identity.  For example, the rule about smoking in public places.  Well yes, that was a rule, but a rule often ignored.  Especially when the owner was a smoker.  OK the English pub quiz in the Irish bar banned smoking during the actual quiz time.  At the break time many went off and smoked things that would even have been banned from the most liberal of bars, down a nearby alley. The rest of the time you could just smoke cigarettes in the Irish pub.

I looked forward to the fortnightly pub quiz immensely.  It was hosted by an incredibly genial and dryly humorous Scot who was wedded to a local and had been in the country for decades.  I went with my American friend who was unfathomably tall, very outgoing and a local at the pub.  When he once upset the barmaid there. something horrible was put in his drink and he ended up shitting himself as a result.  Never upset barmaids in the Irish pub in Bratislava.

When it snowed each winter,  everyone had to clear the snow from the pavement in front of their house.  So we all did that.  But when I thought I was being helpful by shovelling the snow from in front of the old widow’s house next door, she was immediately out doing it for herself.  I think I offended her by implying that she was too old to do this.  And then, when we had just moved in to the house which we had bought, the water inlet pipe froze.  The same neighbour’s son spoke good English and he had given me his number in case we should require assistance.  I phoned him to ask where to find a plumber.  He was round within 15 minutes, with his mate, a local plumber.  They spent a good two hours defrosting the pipe (after having to remove the floor tiles from the downstairs toilet floor to get to them) and then insulating it, before inviting me back to the plumber’s house for some home-distilled hooch and a jam (we had chatted about out mutual interests in playing the guitar).  I had actually offered some cash to the guy, but he said that we were neighbours and then insisted that it would be upsetting for him if I were not to come round to his house for a taste of his home made liqueur.  People were expected to give up seats on buses for the old or mothers with young children and would be badmouthed if they didn’t.  Maternity leave went up to six years.  There was a sense of community.

There are also areas of outstanding natural beauty to discover.  The Tatra mountains in the winter are exquisite.  There are Disney-esque castles to explore, wooden-housed villages or even gold mines.  And we haven’t even got to the culture yet (see my post “Bratislava is for Life, Not Just Christmas Markets“).  I used to love the festival season in the autumn.  We lived yards from the “Cabbage Festival” ground. which was a funfair, music and folk festival all rolled into one glittering three-day event.

The house we bought on a one hundred percent mortgage.  It had been built before the Second World War and the owner who sold it had been born in one of the front rooms.  His daughter was the estate agent who sold it to us.  Her mother had passed away some years before and the father had a new partner with whom he was moving to Prague.  So the three generation family house was now for sale.  There were many things left in the house: old tools from the near post-war years left in the old garage (I was grateful for that); furniture and even some X-rays from the agent’s mother stuffed behind the built-in 1950’s style wardrobes downstairs.  This was a family house.  I always wondered who stuffed those x-rays behind the built-in furniture and why? The house had the most beautiful garden, lovingly and long-time planted with flowers which would come up in rotation throughout the year.  The walnut tree had been planted on the day the house was finished in the twenties by the agent’s grandfather and gave us bucket-loads of nuts.  I could never understand why walnuts were so expensive when I came back to the UK.  We had so many that I even eventually tried my hand at a walnut liqueur.  My daughter had a rope swing on that tree.  She became adept at the age of four at cracking walnuts with a brick from the fire-pit.  There was a lovely fire-pit underneath that tree (see my post “The Sounds of Silence” for pictures).  Under the house was a cellar with the most eccentric heating boiler you could ever imagine.  It made unusual noises.  It could bark, cough or sing.  We never quite worked out how to contact utility companies and one day when I was at work a very large man, with a very large monkey wrench,knocked on the door.  He spoke no English.  My wife spoke no Slovak.  He went down into the cellar and removed the gas meter, sealing off the pipe and leaving us with no hot water nor heating.  When we got it replaced the new meter was faulty and just clicked around the zero, never going forwards,  so the gas company just made up a reading, told us that they had to replace the replaced meter and charged us according to their whim.  One spring a bird nested on our terrace.  It was magical.

In the summer temperatures soar to the high 30’s degrees centigrade.  Come winter-time it would get very cold.  And I mean VERY.  The car’s thermometer went down to minus 26 one day on the way to work.  Once the garage door would not open so we had to get the bus to work.  We didn’t realise what a risk we were taking with the small child in the pushchair.  It was a good twenty minutes walk from the bus stop to work and small child was damn lucky not to have suffered from hypothermia by the time we got there.  We have worked in Jordan where everything closes down come one drop of snow, and the same is true of England, it now seems, but in Slovakia everyone is used to it, snow ploughs are instantly out, everyone pitches in and nothing ever stops, however cold or snowy or may be.

Whenever we travelled back to the UK our elderly neighbour somehow seemed to get subliminal messages and would appear with cakes and sweet treats for the journey.  She was a life-long friend of the previous owner and he once came to stay with her with his partner.  We invited him in to see the renovations we had done.  He was amazed.  We had contacts at work who put us in touch with a builder and the house was stunning.  Upstairs was one huge, beamed room, but large enough to feel like separate rooms from each extremity.  Downstairs the Heath-Robinson electricity pillar, with its glowing lights and spaghetti wiring had gone along with the attached 1970’s breakfast bar to leave a large, open-plan kitchen, all shiny and new with a six-seater mango wood dining table in the centre.  This room was the heart of the house.  It was, quite simply a proper home in its rustic, shabby-chic state.  The lounge was warmed by a wood-burner come winter.  Tons of cut logs had been left in the shed at the bottom of the garden, and we hardly even made a dent in it despite regular wood-burner use and fire pit fun.

Slovakia is a tiny country, with a population of less than five and a half million people.  It was always the “backward” half of the old Czechoslovakia.  So any sporting event in which this tiny country excels is actually quite a remarkable achievement.  Take ice hockey, football or any number of winter sports as examples.  The ratio of sports facilities to population is amongst the highest in the world here.

Slovaks look after their homes in an impeccable way.  People will tell you they “tidied up” if you ask them about their weekend.  And by this they mean that they have made their houses spotless.  Again.

For sure, there are good peeps and bad peeps in Slovakia, but I, for one, met many of the former.  Slovakia is a miniscule but proud country which punches far above its weight.  So thank you, Slovakia, for a tickety-boo time in your lovely country.  Respect.

You Can Get Anything You Want at Alice’s Restaurant

I was thinking back to one summer I spent in New England, and these thoughts popped into my head… My friend Billy, from Kentucky, has the most fabulous gift of being able to tell stories… and I don’t really mean just tell; he brings them to life.  Billy maintains that his Dad was even better.  The way that many Americans do this has always struck me, be it through narration, song or film (scroll to the bottom for more examples).  And this song here is a perfect example, from my youth.

I remember when there was always a map showing Phnom Penh on the news.  It sounded exotic and interesting.  People seemed to be getting their knickers in a twist about the place.  Maybe this was one of the early seeds of my travel bug.  I was quite young: the Vietnem War was in full swing.  And then, when I found my own musical tastes some eight or nine years later, I got into the Woodstock Album.  This was my introduction to Arlo Guthrie and I shortly afterwards discovered this tune: it was the most fantastic storytelling-song I had ever heard, and to this day never have I heard a better one.  It blew me away.

Arlo Guthrie was the son of the folk singer Woody Guthrie, who hobo-ed around the dust bowl writing songs about the results, or rather victims, of the “American Dream” he came across.  He suffered from the terrible Huntingdon’s disease.  Sadly, this is hereditary.  After Woody’s death, a suitcase of unsung lyrics was found in the attic and the niece, I think, or maybe his widow, I can’t remember, but whoever was the surviving heir, had to decide what to do with them.  Woody by this time had become a virtual patron saint of folk song, patriotism (“This Land is Your Land”) and generally standing up for the working people of the good ol’ US of A.  He counted Bob Dylan amongst his followers.  In the end the heir decided that the living musician most in harmony with Woody’s worldview was … Billy Bragg, another songster in tune with the plight of the working people (although patently not American).  He was over-awed by the compliment and called in some American musicians (Wilko) to help put some tunes to the long-lost lyrics.  Finally, the Americans and Billy Bragg fell out, after making a cracking album together, largely because they could not countenance a Brit being given rights to part of their musical folk history.   That is where Arlo’s pedigree comes from.  From the very roots of American folk, from the depths of the dust bowl at the time when Scott-Fitzgerald was gathering material for “The Great Gatsby” and Steinbeck’s “Of Mice and Men” was being played out for real in Texas and the surrounding states.  Arlo came along in the next generation: hippies and flower power.  These were the heirs of Woody Guthrie’s times.  But Arlo in many ways honoured and maintained his father’s legacy, bringing with him the tradition of storytelling to observe life as it was in the USA at the time.  And what a compellingly-told, laugh-out-loud-funny story it is in “Alice’s Restaurant”.   So close your eyes, follow the tale and listen.

This is what Wikipedia has to say, if you want to know more of the history go here:
“Alice’s Restaurant Massacree”
Song by Arlo Guthrie
from the album Alice’s Restaurant
Released October 1967
Recorded 1967
Genre Talking bluesfolk music
Length 18:34
Label Warner Bros.
Songwriter(s) Arlo Guthrie
Producer(s) Fred Hellerman

Alice’s Restaurant Massacree” (self-identified multiple times in the lyrics of the song itself as “Alice’s Restaurant“) is a song by singer-songwriter Arlo Guthrie, released as the title track to his 1967 debut album Alice’s Restaurant. It is notable as a satirical, first-person account of 1960s counterculture, in addition to being a hit song in its own right and an inspiration for the 1969 film also named Alice’s Restaurant. The song is Guthrie’s most prominent work, based on a true incident from his life that began on Thanksgiving Day1965 with a citation for littering, and ended with the refusal of the U.S. Army to draft him because of his conviction for that crime. The ironic punch line of the story is that, in the words of Guthrie, “I’m sittin’ here on the Group W bench ’cause you want to know if I’m moral enough to join the Army—burn women, kids, houses and villages—after bein’ a litterbug.” The final part of the song is an encouragement for the listeners to sing along, to resist the draft, and to end war.

The song consists of a protracted spoken monologue, with a constantly repeated fingerstyle ragtime guitar (Piedmont style) backing and light brush-on-snare drum percussion (the drummer on the record is uncredited), bookended by a short chorus about the titular diner; Guthrie has used the short “Alice’s Restaurant” bookends and guitar backings for other monologues bearing the Alice’s Restaurantname. The track lasts 18 minutes and 34 seconds, occupying the entire A-side of the Alice’s Restaurant album. The work has become Guthrie’s signature song and he has periodically re-released it with updated lyrics.

If you like songs that tell stories check out: Top of the World by the Dixie Chicks; Townes Van Zandt’s Pancho and Lefty; or Steve Earle’s Home to Houston; Me and the Eagle and Copperhead Road.   There are many more fabulous examples of the genre but these are some of my favourites.

Desert Christmas – The Festival of the Desert, Tunisia

It was “Christmas” and we felt the need to get away from it all so booked a cheap all-in package to Tunis. At the hotel the beer was virtually undrinkable and the food not much better. Karaoke and people bribing waiters to reserve seats in the restaurant was the order of the day. It got to the day before Christmas Eve and people were now paying waiters for the best seats at the Christmas Day lunch (for which a supplement was payable) and front seats to watch the “traditional” floor show at the meal. The beer was still undrinkable. There was a hire car place opposite the hotel. What to do? Very little choice actually. We got into a hire car and drove some 350 km’s south to the Festival of the Desert, which is where we spent Christmas Day that year (2005). Not a hint of tinsel, no mince pies and no floor show. This was the real McCoy: camel racers in elegant, dazzling white robes astride huge and magnificent beasts the colour of urban snow; hawk fliers looking as proud as their noble birds; dusty eagle handlers; earnest-looking horse racing competitors carrying rifles; happy dancers and a curious man in a red waistcoat balancing pots on his head. They came from all corners of the Sahara for this festival. Each seemed to be wearing the colours of their tribe. And what an extravagant event it was. We were lucky to get a room in a cheap hotel and ate at a street stall for Christmas Day lunch. Many of the participants seemed to have pitched their traditional Bedouin tents just outside the festival ground where cooking fires burned and old men sat around in the sunshine. In the evening some of these impressive nomads in their full desert garb sat talking on their mobile phones and discussing the day’s events in the hotel bar. No-one celebrated Christmas, but everyone celebrated their desert culture. This was a truly spectacular Anti-Christmas.
These photos were taken on Christmas day 2005

He Who Could Not Be Named – Gaddafi’s Libya

It’s about time I got to Libya on this blog.  But the whole experience takes a bit of time to get over.  Tash had just given birth, we had agreed that it was the time to leave Jordan and this thick South African voice turned up on my phone one evening, giving a short “interview” and then offered both me and Tash a job without even speaking to her.  It was like speaking against the noise of a vacuum cleaner.  OK.

So we flew out to Tripoli, meeting our new upstairs neighbours, arriving from Malawi, on the plane.   They are still friends, and now work in Mozambique.  It was a bizarre collection of people on the flight.  I bought a battery razor on the way and the (male) flight attendant asked me in a way that I can only describe as flirtatious, if I was going to trim my goatee when I got to Tripoli.  Meanwhile passengers were desperately drinking before arrival in the dry country.

So we were prepared for months of no alcohol.  In the event, when we arrived at the school, the welcome party at the Primary Head’s house (who had “interviewed” me) was rammed with home made wine and Tunisian bootleg beers.  Staff we met were suspicious of us and cautiously welcoming.  It did not take long to get the measure of the place.  Each holiday there was some uncertainty as to who would return and who would do a runner.  There was just the one scruffy supermarket in Tripoli, where it was normal to see expats with trolleys full of grape juice.  They imported yeast (they told customs that it was for allergy-required bread-making if questioned) and made vast quantities of wine in 10 litre water bottles with a condom on the top. When the top blew, you knew it was ready for bottling.  Small stubbies could be purchased for about £4 a can from the regular taxi driver to the school, Faraj.  Or you could buy “Flash” – a malevolent home-distilled spirit made by West African immigrants and only palatable if taken with a good amount of fruit juice.  In short, everyone seemed desperate for alcohol in the expat circle.  So when it was Remembrance Day and a very moving service in the Commonwealth War Grave Commission cemetery in Tripoli commemorating the campaign of the Desert Rats, and the Ambassador invited all those present back to his residence for canapés and a drink… well who would not concur?

There was an Embassy club where there was a bar, but our school, unlike the other British School, was banned from it because one of our staff had been reported to the authorities prior to our arrival for weeing against a wall which turned out to be that of a mosque after one heavy session there (“there” being the Club, not the mosque).  It caused a bit of a hoo-ha.  The other school was superior in every way.  Their staff had multiple entry-exit visas so could head off to Malta, Cyprus, Tunisia or wherever, for weekends if the life here got too much for them.  They lived in a compound which was secure and guarded.  Once, one of our colleagues was followed home in his car.  They went into the driveway after him and took the car off him at gunpoint. In true Libyan style (polite and considerate) they said, “Take anything of personal value from the car,  but this is our car now.”  Our school took your passports off you on arrival, with their single entry visas, and kept them under the pretence of getting work permits, exit visas and permissions.  It would always take the whole term and sometimes people would not even know if they had the exit visa in their passport until they arrived at the airport and a school flunky turned up with them… or in some cases did not.  People had been stuck there and not been able to leave for the holiday after having booked and paid for their flights.

This happened to one teacher, whose wife had flown home to have their child.  I can still remember seeing the poor man, broken and cowed, outside the school office every afternoon to see if he could get home to see his new-born.  Eventually it got to the stage where his wife’s family gave him an ultimatum – you get home within a week or this marriage is over.  He was still stuck without the exit visa he needed to leave the country when we left.  Apparently the principal didn’t like him.  He was hoping that he could persuade his wife to return to Libya, where the money was good, so had not told her the real reason he was not on the next flight home.

Mobile phones did not work in Libya.  You had to use the one the school provided.  These were bugged.  There were certain words, like “Gaddafi” for example, that would trigger a click and all went very muffled, your credit would go down at triple rates.  And once, when someone was speaking in Welsh on the phone, a voice came on and interrupted with the words: “Speak in English”.  It was said that the houses were also bugged and that each street had a local informer who was obliged to provide a report on subversive behaviour every so often.  They had to do this, whether there was any or not, so if nothing had come to light then they had to make it up.  It became apparent, after we had left, that the Principal had access, and used this access to every email we had sent or received.  He had blended in to the local culture seamlessly.

When Gaddafi spoke to the nation, all shops had to close and everyone was expected to listen, or watch the TV.  But he knew how to keep people sweet.  New births accrued a sizeable government payout.  University graduates were paid at graduate rates, even if they did not find a job.  But it was advised never to mention Gaddafi by name, inside your house or elsewhere.  It really was like Voldemort in the Harry Potter books.  No-one even dared to speak his name.

Taxis were unspeakably dangerous vehicles and sadly we lost the “reliable” one used by the school.  Friends from Jordan had come to visit as they were there on business.  I do not know what was said (in Arabic) between our friend’s Jordanian colleague, Jamal, and Faraj when we collected them on the journey back to our house.  But after that Faraj would never pick us up.  He was always busy, or accepted, but then simply did not turn up.  There was some rivalry between Jordanians and Libyans that must have kicked in and that we did not understand.  So we were left to take our chances with the nuttier ones.

Having said all that, we did make the most of our time in Libya.  Our house was on a sand road just behind the school in Saraj (a suburb of Tripoli), deeply rutted, and impossible to push a baby buggy on.  We used to have to drag it backwards down to the local shops.  Vehicles had to drive it at walking pace.  Most of the local shops were convenience stores.  Our favourite, a fruit and veg shop, had a lovely man who would always coo over the baby and pick out a red rose, “marsh’allah-ing”.  (Marsh’allah = sweetie”).  He would carefully pick off all the thorns and give it to her, every time.  She, in turn, would then fastidiously pick off all the petals on the way home.  We also took an amazing trip down to Ghadames, close to the Tunisian border, with our friends/upstairs neighbours.  OK, we had to get a letter from the Principal requesting, on officially-headed note paper, that no-one would hinder us on our travels and assistance would be provided if needed, but it was a great trip.  The school were still holding our passports.  We went to Sabratha, a beautiful, un-touristed Roman site on the Mediterranean coast.  Then on to Ghadames – an ancient stop on the caravan route between Cairo and Tunis.  It is a town of restored, ancient white-buildings where most of the “roads” are covered alleyways.  Women lived their entire life on the upper floors, never allowed to set foot upon the earth.  They shopped by lowering baskets down to the markets and got around the entire place on rooftops and by walking on the top of walls.  The town made its living on protection money and tolls from travellers.  There had been a British consulate there many years ago.  It would have been weeks of hard travel from civilisation and would have been a bit of a punishment posting for any civil servant working for the British Empire.  We had booked the trip through contacts at school and when we got to Ghadames the house we had booked was occupied, so they tried to send us to a nasty hotel a way out of town.  It took a bit of a stand-off to get what we had expected.  We also stopped off at Nalut Qasr – a fortified 13th century granary, completely deserted and totally atmospheric (see post “99 photos from Libya“).

One of “He-Who-Could-Not-Be-Named’s” nephews was at the school.  At first, his personal security guards would hang out outside the classroom in the corridor smoking, and ensuring security, presumably.  Eventually, they were persuaded to wait in their black-windowed 4WD in the car park and only came out during play times.  Children were allowed to play around the scaffolding where building works were being done and at one evening performance, the windows were shot at.  The Head of Primary was a South African thug.  He insisted that he was not pandering to the locals’ demands and that if they turned up late for concerts/assemblies then they would not be admitted (“They will have a 240 lb 6″4 South African to deal with,” he said).  He stood on the door to enforce this, chest thrust forward and trying to look like an imposing bouncer (head of a primary school?), even when Gaddafi’s family was involved, he turned them away too.  I later learned from my classroom assistant that the discussion between the parents and their security guards went something like this:

“Do you want me to take him out for you, boss?”

“No, he’s not worth it.”

The Principal was from New Zealand and consequently so were many of the staff.  This included the best man from his wedding amongst others.  This person had a son at school and the (English NQT) Year One teacher, who had a penchant for young boys, had started an affair with him when he was 15.  After we left and the school still held our daughter’s birth certificate, I had asked for it back, and heard nothing:  until I brought this matter of paedophilia and the complicity of the Principal to the company’s attention.  The reaction of the Principal had been, “I don’t think there is a policy on this so I can not do anything” (with regards to my friend’s son) when complaints from parents were received.  The company agreed to return the birth certificate on the condition that I never mentioned the whole unfortunate series of events again.  It is a Dubai-based, global education company.  They also threatened to ensure that the UK authorities retracted my teaching certificate if I did not withdraw all allegations. Yeah, right.  I got the birth certificate back.

Please look at “99 Photos from Libya” to see how beautiful this country should and could be.  But in the event, we packed up as much of our stuff as we could (more than we could carry), got an exit visa and our passports back from the school the evening before we left and then resigned when we got home.  It was only a case of good luck that we were let out of the country with about £600 excess baggage fees. We could not have got any shipping out of the country without a final exit visa so just took what we could.  On the plane, the flight attendants were immediately besieged with requests for drinks, to which they knowingly complied, very quickly, even before take off.  We hired a very large long-distance taxi from the airport to our house in the UK along with our three airport trolleys, each one packed higher than any of our head heights.  From Gatwick to Somerset was time enough to have a chat and tell our story.  The taxi driver told us: “Wow, I’ve never picked up people who have run away from a country before.”

Shortly afterward, the whole place blew up and our colleagues had to run for their lives.  We saw some of them interviewed on the BBC News at the airport.  A lucky escape for us in the end.  At least we left without an emergency evacuation.  They lost everything they had there.

But this photo, from International Day, says it all for me.  It is of an American child and a Libyan in my class, sworn enemies at the time, and still to this day.  They say it is 6183 miles from Texas to Tripoli, but I don’t believe that…

Malaysia – In the footsteps of the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders

My post reblogged for Remembrance Day.

wheatypetesworld's avatarWheatyPete's World

I never knew my Great Uncle Ron. He was killed in Malaya (as it then was) in 1941, serving with the Argyll and Sutherland Highlanders. But the very mention of his name, by any of my generation or younger of the family to any of the older members of the family would automatically elicit the same response. Verbatim. “You would have loved Ron.” He had become a sort of family saint. Ronald Joseph Baxter had suffered from TB in his teenage years and was considered infirm, so was delighted to be accepted for active service at the age of twenty five in order to prove to himself, as well as to other people, that he was fighting fit. He was to die before his 26th birthday. Soon after training he was sent to Singapore. Ron was a staunch Christian and a member of the Oxford Group, or Moral Re-Armament, a…

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France – My Secret Mistress

I have a lifelong love affair that I have maintained since I was about eleven years old: with France. Actually, I can date it pretty precisely – 1974. The first time I went there was a family camping trip, and I can remember listening to the Eurovision song contest in the car on the radio as we got into France and just before we lost the signal. That was the year that Waterloo kick-started the global career of a little-known band from Sweden, of all places, called Abba. We headed down to Le Lavendou, stopping in Paris and via the Loire Valley then through Lyon on the way.  In Paris, I was so afraid when the football was kicked into long grass, and I had to either get it or lose my football.  I thought I would be bitten by a snake as we were “abroad”.  And then, after A’ Levels I worked out that if you studied a language then you would get a year’s sponsored travel to some exotic place. So I opted for French. Don’t forget that this was in the time when you had to have a passport stamped to travel through Europe. You got cosmetics in the aeroplane toilets and a free pack of cards if you asked for them. I knew this from trips to Egypt, Singapore, USA and Malaysia by that time. But France was still pretty “abroad”.  Package holidays to Spain were the newbies on the block.

So I spent a year studying at the University of Lyon. And I loved every minute of it. It was still only 37 years from the end of the Second World War, so the memories or stories of the local Resistance leader, Jean Moulin, were still fresh in the minds of the older generation of people you spoke to. As were those of Klaus Barbie, the notorious SS commander for the region. It was reported that Klaus Barbie had killed Jean Moulin, once he had captured him, by tying up his arms behind his back and dragging him down a flight of stone steps, banging his head all the way down.  They still spoke about that around here.  Once, one weekend, I just took a random bus to the end of the line out in the local area and walked around the countryside lanes by the village. I was amazed at the number of memorials to those fallen “at this very spot”.  That Easter was hot and I spent it hitch-hiking with a tent around Provence and the Ardeche.  When I came home I hitched all the way.  I was lucky and got a lift from Lyon all the way to Paris.  The guy apoligised and asked if I would mind a detour, as he had to pick up some wine from a vineyard on the way.  Wine tasting ensued in the owner’s kitchen.  The driver owned a restaurant in Monmartre and said he would speak to his neighbour who ran a hotel and see me right for the night: it was a good lift.  The next day I got fined for walking on the motorway, but they said they’d let me off if I played them a song.  That night I spent sleeping on a verge on the Paris-Calais road.  When I awoke, I spotted an isolated roadside café a way back down the route, which I had not seen in the dark.  “How are you?” I asked, in a night-in-the-the-open-dishevelled sort of way.  “Better than you, by the looks of it,” the man replied.  Then he gave me coffee and croissants for free.

I returned to Lyon many years later and the fond summer-sun-filled memories I had of those halcyon student days were replaced by a drab, rather gridlocked, industrial urban sprawl. I just drove through it, so did not revisit the gorgeous old town and marvel at squares where 15th to 20th century architecture has been blended with a perfection and flare that could only be French. See this WordPress post for memories of that trip. In all it was a bit disappointing. Maybe my memories were just rose-tinted. The area where I used to live looked more like an inner-city ghetto. And then I remembered the less rose-tinted side: the intricate bureaucracy that used to drive us mad; the cheap, filterless, cow-dung-tasting Galloise cigarettes that we all tried so hard to like; glorious parks that had signs saying you were not allowed on the grass, and a picnic we once had planned spoiled when the officious park keepers turned up; and the hard experiences of the buskers I got to know there. One of them claimed to be the singer/guitarist of the Racing Cars: a one-hit-wonder band who came good with their song ‘They Shoot Horses Don’t They?He was left with a limp after a car smash on the road in Germany and was now busking for a living on the Metro in Lyon.  What a great musician he was.  Gareth was his name.  He was Welsh, and was from the Rhonda Valley, but I was still not sure about his tales.  However, watching the link above, finding this video and reading the comments,  Gareth was certainly very close to being Gareth “Morty” Mortimer and he did do a stunning version of their one-hit-wonder song.

And talking of songs, please listen the one below the gallery to get a flavour of France while have a wander through these pictures:

I still love France, have spent a fair amount of time there and have returned as often as I can.  Each visit gives me a different take on my student days. The latest trip was this summer, 2017. And as usual all the old memories came back in some way or another – they do every time. I still enjoy the language, the long lunch hours, a formally observed ritual in one way, and a lovely one at that, or how artists, in the broadest sense – meaning poets, philosophers or playwrights and the like – are still seen as sages, of whom the opinions are sought on moral, social or political issues. OK, so my French may be a little outdated in its adherence to the strict rules of the “Academie Française” which actually codifies with some practical authority the correct use of the language, but I can still converse freely and still enjoy Samuel Beckett’s jibe in “Waiting For Godot” about the “Aca-ca-cademie Française” (caca being the French for poo-poo). And thereby lies the problem. On the one hand we have an innovative, creative nation, blessed with artistic genius of the anarchic variety, and on the other a nation strung up by its formal Napoleonic obeisance to rules. Did I just make “obeisance” a synonym for couilles (French for … look it up!)?

So, back to 2017. I was surprised to be told that on French campsites you were not allowed swimming shorts, they had to be “Speedos”. Oh no! Again we go back to the seventies, and a lot less of a savoury side this time. If you don’t remember Speedos, then feel very blessed. Never look them up. They were, to be quite frank, little more than brightly-coloured swimming thongs for men. I once had a union jack pair. So give me some kudos for honesty here, but there are no pictures. Sadly… I mean luckily.

Equally luckily, the friend who told me about this latest rule on campsites in France was wrong. Unluckily, it was only slightly wrong. The rule was that you had to wear a “maillot de bain”, or swimming briefs, not speedos. It was interdit (forbidden) to wear my trusty swimming shorts. But in heaven’s name why? Why would you not be allowed on the grass to eat your picnic in a lovely park that was mostly grass? You beautiful artists have just obeisanced –up again. Why? Well, I asked the lifeguard. He told me that it was on account of the regional council… oh here we go again… who maintained that sand could be trapped in the pockets of ones swimming shorts, so could represent some discomfiture to the pool. I pointed out that I could, equally, have some sand trapped between my buttocks, but he was still having none of my swimming shorts in his pool. It was back to the grass in the parks of Lyon. And then I was off on one, noticing every bureaucratic idiocy/cincracity that still exists in this lifelong mistress of mine. Sometimes it is perfectly laudable. I always loved the directness of “Lever le pied” (lift your foot) rather than SLOW DOWN on automated road signs. (Now refer to the slideshow above…). Or “Think of our children – drive slowly at walking pace”. But then you equally have the – to me – nutty ones, like “No soap in summer” in the campsite toilet block. Why not? Surely people sweat more and therefore need more soap in summer. Do they not realise also that people go to the toilet in summer as well as in other seasons, so need to wash their hands then too?  Or if you want to get even more officious then you appeal to the rule of law: Smoking here incurs a fine of Euros68 or pursuance before the municipal police tribunal. And then you get to the real heavy one: Formellement interdit. Formally forbidden. Work it out for yourself in the picture.  I have another confession to make here.  I don’t think it’s as bad as my union jack Speedo’s… but I only got that photo about lady’s things by mistakenly wondering into the opposing (as it were) shower block on the first night in a campsite near Roscoff.

But do you know what? It is these human contradictions that are partly responsible for my love of France. How could you be anarchic in your Art if not rebelling against formality and tradition? How could you be a rebel without a cause? The truth is that the French can actually excel at both ends of the spectrum. I still love France.  A rebel with plenty of cause.

1974
A couple of years before Speedos hit town – 1974 myself and my brothers wore the officially approved maillots-de-bain.  But I still prefer swimming shorts.

Peaches For Sale

Very sadly, we have to sell Peaches now. £18995. Use contact if you are interested. A couple of songs to accompany the gallery…

Ī

Question: Did Somebody Just Murder Peaches? 12-09-17

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Sometimes you write just to get things off your chest. So I write this now because yesterday my chest was very nearly an ex-chest. Somebody inflicted GBH on Peaches. And damn near killed me.

I stay at work in a quiet corner of the car park next to a field on the edge of Exmoor during the week. It’s too far for a daily commute, until I start my new job in Plymouth. But this week we have our old buddies Eric and Ivana in from Bratislava for a couple of days home here in Totnes. They were going to come to work with me to see a British school – until they clocked Totnes (and realised it would mean leaving at 6:30am) and decided to spend the day here. Cooked us a meal for when we got home – nice house guests! So I was at home Monday night. Tuesday was the early commute of 65 miles. I am a few miles from work on the windy (as in winding not blowing) A road along the Exe Valley between Tiverton and Bampton, driving quite nicely if I may say so myself, when a truck appears round the corner on the wrong side of the road, trying to overtake a line of cars at speed. It is true what they say. Time does slow down to milliseconds. There is this truck heading straight for me on the wrong side of the road outside a line of cars into which he can not pull in. He fills my windscreen. I swerve on to the verge on the wooded bank down to the river and come to stop. The flatbed slams into Peaches’ door, carving her open like a can of tuna fish, straight through the steel. With the mirror gone I can not see what happened behind me next. No-one was seriously hurt but all are very shaky when details are exchanged.

So I limp to work with Peaches’ offside a mess. Then to the insurance phone calls. They send out a rescue truck which arrives after an hour and forty minutes. My body has stopped shaking but has now started aching. I go with the man in the rescue vehicle towards home. But the insurance broker had not informed the insurance company of our recent change of address, who in turn had not informed the rescue company so they are only contracted to take me to my old address six miles away. There I was left for a couple of hours. Then there is a phone call from the new rescue vehicle. They have reversed the job details so are now at Station Road Totnes, home, rather than Station Road Bampton, old home. I sit in Peaches , photograph the damage and worry that she is a write-off.

The doorframe is detached from the sub-frame and the door itself is just carved up into sharp jagged steel.

I look at the fridge magnets – all the countries she has seen us through – the stickers from festivals. I contemplate the trinkets we hang around Peaches for a homely feel, keep getting flashbacks of that truck on the wrong side of the road filling my windscreen and feel unspeakably sad that she may well turn out to be a victim of murder, not just GBH. At least Eric and Ivana had stayed at home. Memories of all the good times with Peaches float around my head during the next three hours of waiting. I am home at six, but still worried that the insurance assessor may write Peaches off. I need to go to the quack’s tomorrow… and sort out the assessor….

With thanks to the BrazziBay Forum and my friends there for their amazing support:

Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 3:03 pm
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_______________________________________

Steve,  Jo  TigerLily and Carra the Child lovin’ Golden Cocker

So hope Peaches can be fixed up. Please keep us posted and please stay positive.  Devastating news, just so glad that you came through this terrible event and can recount it to us. 
TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 3:28 pm
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Blimey Pete sorry to see this.

Depending on how flexible your insurance company are and how they currently value Peaches – with regards to her mileage and condition otherwise, she may be repaired. The hardest job will be sourcing a new Brazilian door.

Keep us posted please?

________________________________________________________________________________

Max SportzKombi – The Bay Racer and Tango – the Fizzy Kombi

@brazilianvwbay

wheatypete

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 3:43 pm
Thanks for the kind words BeakyBoy, I am pretty pee-ed off right now, but that helps.  And thanks Tim for your response.  I will try to remain positive.  I will not give up my Peachy that easily!
dizzylizard

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 3:56 pm
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Sorry to hear about this Pete, I’m sure you will get loads of support from everyone here.

I know the Brazilian doors are hard to source Tim, but apart from the swage line, do the standard doors fit. The swage line appears to be cosmetic, and I was wondering if a decent panel beater/bodywork man could add a swage line to match, I was thinking along the lines of something that could be attached to the door and over-painted. I’m probably way out, but just a thought.

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 4:01 pm
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Sorry to read about Peaches, but glad you are all OK.

Doo remain positive and as others have said doo keep us informed of any progress.

________________________________________________________________________________

Proud winners of Spike’s Trophy 2017

Scooby – Born To Run

harryhornet

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 5:32 pm
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Sorry to see this. Don’t lose hope, there must be a Brazibay out there that’s being broken up and sold as parts and has a new donor door for Peaches.

TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 7:36 pm
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I wish someone would just import used panels from Brazil!!

If no one else here wants to, then I will!!

________________________________________________________________________________

Max SportzKombi – The Bay Racer and Tango – the Fizzy Kombi

@brazilianvwbay

Marco silva

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 8:01 pm
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I’m about to start to import some parts from Brazil ( new and used) just need some advice about which parts are in high demand…. maybe a partner too…..

TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 8:02 pm
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Doors!!!

________________________________________________________________________________

Max SportzKombi – The Bay Racer and Tango – the Fizzy Kombi

@brazilianvwbay

TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 8:03 pm
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Classic Bay doors will fit @dizzylizard but the hinges need altering.

________________________________________________________________________________

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@brazilianvwbay

Marco silva

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Wed Sep 13, 2017 8:16 pm
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I’ll get some doors….

dizzylizard

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Thu Sep 14, 2017 7:18 am
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Morning Pete, hope you are well. Having had another look at your pictures in the cold light of day I’m sure that Peaches is repairable, however the insurance company, who are only going to look at the situation in monetary terms, may, and it is only a may, look at it differently, ie suggest a write off sum.

All is not lost though, if they consider it a write off, it will probably be a category C or D which means it may be worth you considering buying Peaches back off them and having her repaired yourself. Here are a couple of links that may help.

https://www.moneysupermarket.com/car-insurance/articles/rights-and-wrongs-of-insurance-write-off/#/10

https://www.gov.uk/scrapped-and-written-off-vehicles/insurance-writeoffs

If the worst happens, it may be worth getting a body shop that deals with kombis to give you an estimate of a repair cost, armed with that you can work out, from what the insurance company offer as a buy back cost, if it feasible. I reckon it will be, as we all know the true value. The insurance company, on the other hand will sell the vehicle to a dealer who will either repair it (most likely) or break it for spares, and we know what spares can fetch.

A few points worth noting from the links are:-

1. You still own the vehicle up to the time you accept the insurance company’s settlement figure, so you have the upper hand in any negotiations.

2. Deal directly with the person who is going to sign off the claim when negotiating, rather than a call centre handler. (I know this works having had a claim for my dog refused, until I spoke to someone in authority, when I pointed out they were wrong they paid up immediately  )

3. Even if you have to import a door from Brazil a repair could be cost effective.

Apologies for rambling on, but attempting to give you hope at a sad time

TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Thu Sep 14, 2017 2:35 pm
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Nice post @dizzylizard.

Let’s get Peaches rebuilt whatever – she’s famous and deserves it after all her efforts with the refugees abroad. If you need me to provide an official valuation for her Pete, do let me know. I’m sure Danbury or Brazilian Kampers would also be happy to similarly reflect her worth.

________________________________________________________________________________

Max SportzKombi – The Bay Racer and Tango – the Fizzy Kombi

@brazilianvwbay

TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Thu Sep 14, 2017 2:40 pm
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Here’s a door for starters:

https://produto.mercadolivre.com.br/MLB-869211692-porta-kombi-lado-direito-_JM

________________________________________________________________________________

Max SportzKombi – The Bay Racer and Tango – the Fizzy Kombi

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beakyboy

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Thu Sep 14, 2017 3:40 pm
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I’ve sent an email to a contact in Brazil with respect to shipping/airfreighting a door to the UK to see if they could assist if you sourced one there. I can help with the Customs clearance in the UK should you go down that route.

________________________________________________________________________________

Steve,  Jo  TigerLily and Carra the Child lovin’ Golden Cocker

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Fri Sep 15, 2017 11:24 am
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I love a campaign – Pete this is so great everyone who can pulling together for you and Peaches – feel uplifted on this grey and cold day – I can’t do anything practical or offer any technical advice but Nev, Gary and I are rooting for you both

bob k

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Subject: Is it RIP Peaces   Fri Sep 22, 2017 8:37 pm
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Hi

Having looked at the photos and having been in the trade a long long time ago, I would say it is repairable the door isn’t the problem its the A pillar that looks like it may need straightening out but with modern hydraulic jigs etc today this should not be  a problem. Hope I’m right and all the best

Bob

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Fri Dec 01, 2017 5:00 am
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that’s fixable I’m sure as long as the main section around the door is not bent, I can get parts from brazil no issues and few do come up as scrap from big shunts if you check the salvage sites

wheatypete

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Sun Jan 14, 2018 9:28 pm
I am pleased beyond words to report that Peaches has been resurrected!  I feel like my best friend has come back from touch and go surgery.  Thank you so much for the kind comments.  It was all a long and complicated saga of hire car idiots, an excellent coachworks shop in Exeter and some strange dealings with several random stranger-lawyers who somehow got ALL the details and phoned me asking me to beg for compensation.  How did they know all those details?  But in the end I am just glad to have the girl tickety-boo once more.  That makes me happy… very, very happy!

Last edited by wheatypete on Sun Jan 14, 2018 9:45 pm; edited 1 time in total

TimV

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Sun Jan 14, 2018 9:35 pm
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Great news!

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Sun Jan 14, 2018 10:20 pm
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@wheatypete wrote:

I am pleased beyond words to report that Peaches has been resurrected!  I feel like my best friend has come back from touch and go surgery.  Thank you so much for the kind comments.  It was all a long and complicated saga of hire car idiots, an excellent coachworks shop in Exeter and some strange dealings with several random stranger-lawyers who somehow got ALL the details and phoned me asking me to beg for compensation.  How did they know all those details?  But in the end I am just glad to have the girl tickety-boo once more.  That makes me happy… very, very happy!

P.

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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Mon Jan 15, 2018 8:49 am
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FAB News

The Scooby Duo are so pleased for you.

What a great way to start 2018!

________________________________________________________________________________

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Scooby – Born To Run

 
 
 
 
dazdub
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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Mon Jan 15, 2018 8:52 am
 
 
+
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That’s good news
 
 
 
 
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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Mon Jan 15, 2018 8:51 pm
 
 
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Thats great news. Any after fix pics yet?
 
 
 
 
 
 
wheatypete
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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Mon Jan 15, 2018 10:28 pm
 
 
I will post as soon as we have the next trip away Abu-Phileas.
 
 
 
 
 
 
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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Tue Jan 16, 2018 10:06 am
 
 
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Looking forward to some pics of ‘the new’ Peaches in 2018

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 Scooby – Born To Run

 
 
 
 
 
 
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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Tue Jan 16, 2018 4:43 pm
 
 
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If she’s got new paint, surely she will be looking ‘peachy?!’

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Max SportzKombi – The Bay Racer and Tango – the Fizzy Kombi

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wheatypete
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Subject: Re: Is it RIP Peaches?   Tue Jan 16, 2018 5:53 pm  
 
Peachy by name and peachy by paint, Tim.  At least some of her looks sparkly!  Scooby, there will certainly be some trips and pix this year.

PS: 17-06-18

A cheeky night away in the rain. Welcome back to the game Peaches!

99 photos from Libya 2009

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A stop en route on our trip to Ghadames – we had to get an official letter from the Principal asking people to help and not hinder our passage and offer assistance if required.

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Ghadames mosque.

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Christina and Lucy in Ghadames.

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Ghadames – the original inhabitants were moved out by the government when they restored the ancient town and were housed in nasty new buildings, just like happened at Petra!

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Ghadames was famed for its covered streets.

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Ghadames the doors 1.

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Ghadames the doors 2.

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Ghadames from without

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Outside Ghadames.

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Ghadames – a garden outside the walls.

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Traditional lunch in a typical (restored) Ghadames house.

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Ghadames the doors 3.

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Ghadames mosque.

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Ghadames café – it was a remote town which made a living from tolls and services to caravans travelling the Northern Sahara between Tunis and Tripoli.

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Lucy and Christina  in one of the typical Ghadames alleyways.

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Ghadames outside the mosque.

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Ghadames garden.

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Ghadames lunch.

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Tash and Mollie in Ghadames.

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Mollie.

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Outside the old British consulate in Ghadames.

Ghadames Old British Consulate & Consul's House - Copy
The British consulte in Ghadames today – it was formerly a pretty remote posting involving weeks of travel to the nearest city and was not enjoyed overly much by the consuls.

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How the women lived – never allowed down but got around town on the rooftops and walls, lowering baskets down to the market for shopping.

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Not much to see here at the former British consulate.

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The street where the British consulate was.

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The Allens.

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Unrestored Ghadames.

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More beach – and a nice one.

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Beach.

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International day.

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Tash on the beach.

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Typical beach.

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Me and Mollie on the beach.

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Nalut.

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What Mollie thought of it all.

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Mollie enjoying sightseeing.

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Oasis shade.

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Mollie.

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Mollie at Sabratha.

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One of the first paddles in the sea.

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Nalut.

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Nalut.

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Nalut.

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Olive press.

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Nalut Qasr – 13th century fortified granary.

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Nalut Qasr – one of those undiscovered gems of Libya we discovered.

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Nalut Qasr.

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Nalut Qasr.

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He who could not be named.

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Him.

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Dave – halloween MC.

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The Pied Piper of Tripoli – aka Dave Allen

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Remembrance day service Tripoli.

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Our street and why a pushchair was a difficult vehicle to manoeuvre.

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Military cemetery Tripoli – another of those beautifully maintained by the Commonwealth War Graves Commission.

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A Desert Rat.

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Remembering those who did not return.

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Remembrance Day.

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A touching message.

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After the service the Ambassador invited all those present at the service in the cemetery back to his Residency for drinks and canapés…

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…after two months in the dry country, er… that will be a YES PLEASE!

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Olive press.

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Nalut Qasr.

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Nalut Qasr.

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Nalut Qasr.

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Nalut Qasr.

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Nalut Qasr.

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On the toilet in Sabratha – nice view from the throne room.

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Sabratha.

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Amphitheatre Sabratha – good to find some shade.

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Sabratha amphitheatre.

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Sabratha-Super-Mare.

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Sabratha – so empty and atmospheric.

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Fish detail Sabratha.

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Sabratha Goddess.

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Sabratha Goddess and daughter.

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Sabratha mosaic.

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Sabratha pornography – cheeky!

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Sabratha detail.

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Under the stage at Sabratha.

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Sabratha detail on the front of the stage.

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Sabratha sun.

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On the toilet again at Sabratha.

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The Empress.

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Sabratha columns.

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The Allens – lunch stop en route.

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A touching note.

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Back garden of our house.

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Tripoli back street boys.

Tripoli Medina and harbour
Tripoli harbour and old town.

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Tashes ‘brothel’ (bought in Jordan) in our garden.

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Libyan flag coloured cot.

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On the way to the shops, where in Tripoli the man in the veg shop always pulled the thorns off a rose and gave it to Mollie. who then always pulled all the petals off on the way home.

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Yefren – the town.

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From Yefren hotel.

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Yefren.

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Sandstorm.